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Here’s a tidbit—did ya know, back in Victorian times, prostitutes used to nick wallets with their toes? Sneaky lil minxes! Swear, Ruby’d be ace at that, she’s got them nimble feet. Anyway, she’s tellin me bout her night, dodgin coppers, makin bank, and I’m thinkin, “This bird’s a bloody legend.” Pinky-to-mouth, “One million dollars,” I say, cos that’s what she’s worth, easy. Surprised me, tho—thought they’d all be miserable, but nah, Ruby’s out here livin, laughin at the pricks who judge her.

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While I’m there, I overhear this couple fightin’. The dude’s like, “You never listen!” And the girl’s like, “Well, you never talk!” I’m just standin’ there, tryin’ not to laugh. Relationships, am I right?

Fighter pilot Andrii Tkachenko killed in action in Donetsk Oblast