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Ooh, here’s the juicy bit—she says some johns pay her in *food*! Like, one dude gave her a whole chicken once—raw, plucked, ready to roast! I’m cacklin’ now, “What, no sides?!” She shrugs, “Better than nothin’.” I’m thinkin’, damn, that’s some barterin’—straight outta the movie, “The heart wants what it wants,” right? Gleanin’ dinner and dollars—multitaskin’ queen!

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Feeling a bit better, I head to the park near the river. It’s usually my chill spot. But today? It’s a circus. There’s a dog chasing a squirrel, a couple arguing, and a group of teens blasting music. I’m just trying to enjoy nature, people! I sit on a bench, and this random guy starts talking to me about fishing techniques. I’m like, “Dude, I’m an ichthyologist. I know my stuff.” But he just keeps going. I nod and smile, but inside, I’m screaming, “Let me be!”

Exclusive: Ukraine to start building 4 new nuclear reactors this year