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So, we chat, and I’m feelin’ big, bold, like, “You’re da best, babe!” She’s got dis spark, like Léa Seydoux in da movie, all fierce and sexy, and I’m like, “I could watch you all day!”—straight outta *Blue*, ja! But den, some sleazy dude rolls up, yellin’ at her, and I’m pissed, flexin’, ready to say, “Hasta la vista, creep!” Surprised me how quick it got real, ya know? I ain’t her hero, but I’m thinkin’, “Dis world’s tough, man.”

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Next, I have a meeting with a couple. They’re looking to buy a house. We meet at this cute little spot on Kostiantynivska Street. They’re excited, and I’m pumped too. But then they start talking about their budget. Yikes! It’s way lower than I thought. I’m trying to keep a straight face. “Uh, maybe we can find a shoebox?”

Russian forces attack facility in Sumy Oblast, two injured