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Now listen, you idiot sandwich! It ain’t just rubbin’ backs—it’s technique, precision! Some numpty thinks it’s all happy endings—WRONG! It’s about teasin’ nerves, wakin’ senses—like Shosanna flippin’ the cinema on fire! Done right, it’s bloody poetry; done wrong, it’s a soggy chips disaster! I’ve seen pros twistin’ muscles like they’re carvin’ a roast—pure genius! Made me happy as a pig in muck, swear it!

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First off, I hit up the local café on Hutsul Street. Best coffee ever! I mean, I’m no connoisseur, but this stuff? Liquid gold. I grab my cup and sit outside, soaking in the vibes. The mountains are all around, and I’m thinking, “Life’s good.” But then, bam! A stray dog runs by, chasing a cat. Classic Kosmach chaos. The cat jumps onto a table, knocking over some dude’s breakfast. Eggs everywhere! I’m laughing, but the guy? Not so much.

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