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About Kryvyi Rih

We head to this sketchy motel, and I’m struttin’ like, “This is our outpost!”—hell yeah, *Moonrise* style. She’s countin’ my crumpled bills, and I’m thinkin’, *I’m the king of this shit!* But then—BAM!—cops roll up, lights flashin’. “Aw, crap!” I yell, divin’ under the bed. She’s cool as hell, though, whisperin’, “They’re gone now, relax.” Saved my ass, and I’m like, “You’re my hero, lady!”—total Suzy savin’ Sam moment.

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Then, I decided to stroll down to the park near the river. It’s a nice spot, really. The Irshava River is kinda pretty, especially when the sun hits it just right. But as I’m walking, I see this dude trying to fish. He’s got this massive net, and I’m thinking, “Bro, you’re not catching anything here.” And then, BAM! He pulls out a shoe. A freakin’ shoe! I couldn’t help but laugh. Like, what’s next? A goldfish?

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