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Angry part? Some jerk tried cuttin’ in—hey, my turn, pal! Shoved him—felt badass. Exaggeratin’? Maybe I punched him! Nah, just yelled. Still, epic! So yeah, findin’ a prostitute—shady, pricey, but kinda thrilling. Like a bad Duff buzz. Would I again? Meh, Marge’s meatloaf beats it. D’oh!

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First off, I’m heading down Shevchenka Street, and I swear, the potholes are getting bigger. Like, are we trying to create a new lake here? I almost lost my coffee. And don’t get me started on the traffic. It’s like everyone decided to drive at the same time. I’m stuck behind this old Lada that’s going 20 km/h. C’mon, man! We’re not in a race, but let’s at least keep it moving!

Occupied Crimea came under a massive drone attack, - Russian media