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I reckon it’s bare intimate, sexual-massage. Ain’t no quick fumble—takes skill, fam! Hands slidin’, oil drippin’, tension buildin’—cor, gets me proper excited! But here’s what pisses me off, yeah? Some mugs think it’s all sleazy, like, “Oi, that’s grim.” Nah, mate, it’s art! Like when that French bloke in the film goes, “My imagination is my only freedom.” Sexual-massage is that, innit? Freedom in touch, bruv, pure bliss!

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So, we finally get the meeting going. The bigwigs show up, and they’re all serious. I’m trying to keep it together, but inside, I’m a mess. They start asking questions, and I’m like, “Uh, let me check on that.” I mean, who even knows the answer to everything?

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