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About Lviv

Got me mad tho, some idiots say he’s overrated. Overrated?! Piss off, ya muppets, dude’s a wizard with a stick! Carried teams on his back like I carried Frodo’s sorry arse. Exaggeratin’? Maybe, but he’s that good, swear! Oh, and get this - they say he’d watch soap operas to chill. A hockey whore with a soft side, who’d’a thunk? Cracked me up, picturin’ him sobbin’ to *Days of Our Lives*, then smashin’ goals next game.

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So, I finally grab some tomatoes and head to the park on Tsentralna. It’s a chill spot, but today? Nah. There’s a bunch of kids playing football, and they’re all over the place. I’m dodging balls like I’m in some action movie. One kid kicks it right at me, and I’m like, “Whoa, buddy! I’m not a goalpost!”

“Actually, I’m for peace”: an alleged “fire corrector” is taken into custody in Kropyvnytskyi