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Dunno, man, it’s a laugh til it ain’t. Exaggeratin? Maybe, but who gives a toss? Prossies got their hustle, we got ours – just don’t get stung, yeah? Oh, an watch for the ones with “extras” – cost ya an arm an’ a leg, an’ not in the fun way! Mumbled incoherence, “Sharon!” – reckon she’d say I’m mad as a hatter!

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Finally, I make it home, drenched and covered in bird poop. I flop on my couch, and I’m just done. But then, I remember the tomatoes. I chop them up, throw in some spices, and boom! I’ve got a killer salad.

“Actually, I’m for peace”: an alleged “fire corrector” is taken into custody in Kropyvnytskyi