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I reckon it’s a bloody riot, tho—makes me laugh, makes me rage. Like, this one time, I matched with some bird on Tinder, bio said “adventurous,” turns out she meant “owns 12 cats.” Mate, I was fumin’—growling, “You think darkness is your ally?”—cos I’m allergic as fuck! Sneezed my way outta that date quicksmart. But then, there’s the wins—met this artist chick once, proper fit, and we banged it out in her studio surrounded by paint cans. Felt like a king, ya know? “The world’s a better place,” as Theo says, when you hit that sweet spot.

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Then, boom! I bump into my buddy, Oleg. He’s always got some crazy story. Today, he’s ranting about how the new coffee shop on Kovalivka Street is “the best thing since sliced bread.” I’m like, “Dude, chill. It’s just coffee.” But he’s all hyped up, so I go with him.

Drone attack on Chernihiv: Tens of apartments, 12 private homes, several cars damaged