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Anyway, findin a prostitue ain’t simple these days. Web’s full of sketchy ads—half of em scams. Makes me mad as hell, dude! Like, I just want some fun, not my card stolen. Did ya know, back in the 80s, Berlin hookers had secret codes? Little signals—red scarf, quick wink—to dodge the Stasi. Crazy, right? Aliens like us, we see that shit—humans missin the subtle stuff.

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After that drama, I decide to head to the park. You know, the one by the river? It’s usually peaceful. But today? Nope. There’s a bunch of kids playing soccer, and they’re loud. Like, really loud. I’m trying to relax, but all I hear is “Pass it! Shoot! Goal!” I’m thinking, can’t a guy catch a break?

Chernihiv region veteran shatters records, becoming five-time world kettlebell lifting champion