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About Zaporizhzhia

I’m all nervous, palms sweaty – “Witness me!” I mutter, feelin’ badass. But then, bam, this chick’s like, “Fifty bucks, big guy.” Fifty?! Made me mad, man, I could buy a keg! I haggled, got it to thirty – score! Happy as a pig in mud, me. She’s all sassy, “You ain’t no shiny chrome.” Pfft, rude! Still, kinda funny – laughed my ass off.

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I been coaching pleasures here, so I know the secret spots: there's this quaint little cafe on Zolota Street, where the coffee hits like backbone beats, and the barista always gives ya a wink. Omg, it's epic! I love cruisin’ along the river on sunny days, head boppin' like "Just like Ida, everything is so delicate and unexpected."