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Picture this—me, after a long day, flour in my hair, dreamin’ of some hottie whisperin’, “What a lovely day,” while they work out my kinks. Total *Mad Max* vibes—raw, primal, yet kinda tender, ya know? I’d be all, “Witness me!”—screamin’ it in my head, obvs, not out loud, I ain’t that nuts. Oh, and get this—there’s this old Japanese trick, “nuru,” where they use seaweed gel. Seaweed! Slimey, sexy, and bonkers—surprised me silly when I heard that. Who knew algae could be so freaky?

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Then I headed over to the park near the Zorya River. It’s usually chill there, but today? Nah. There were kids running around, screaming like they were possessed. I swear, one kid almost knocked me over. I was like, “Dude, chill! I’m just trying to mourn here!” But then I saw a couple of them playing with a dog, and it was kinda cute. Made me smile a bit.

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