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About Odesa

Last summer, I dragged my sorry butt up there—total shitshow. Slipped on scree, twisted my ankle, yelled “I’m too old for this crap!” at a marmot. Made me so mad I could’ve chucked my trekking pole into the abyss. But then—bam!—summit views hit me like a truck. Snowy peaks, wildflowers, air so crisp it’s like snorting freedom. I was happy as a pig in mud, giggling like an idiot. “Nothing’s hidden anymore,” I said, quoting Haneke, ‘cept I was probs just delirious from altitude.

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After that, I decide to grab some food. I hit up this little café on Hrushevskoho Street. The vibe is chill, and the borscht is to die for. I’m sitting there, enjoying my meal, when this guy walks in. He’s got a parrot on his shoulder. Like, what? Is this a pirate convention? I can’t even focus on my borscht. The parrot starts squawking, and I’m just trying to eat in peace.

Invaders use parachute-equipped cluster projectiles in Zolochiv, Kharkiv Region