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So, say you’re on the hunt—where d’you even start? Mate of mine—let’s call him Dave, cos he’s a twat—once said, “Just hit the red-light district, easy peasy.” Bollocks! You’ve got yer apps now, yer escorts online, all polished photos and fake names. Reckon it’s like ordering Deliveroo, but with more STDs. Ha! Cackling at that one meself. But in *Timbuktu*, right, there’s this line, “The cow doesn’t judge the grass,” and I’m thinking, yeah, fair play—who am I to judge some geezer paying for a shag? Still, it’s grim, innit?

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You can find some naughty women looking for casual hookups at a few spots in the city, especially during the nighttime. You should also leverage the online dating platforms as it is .

But then, my phone buzzes. It’s the warden’s office. They need me back ASAP. I’m like, “Can’t a guy catch a break?” I chug my coffee and head back. Turns out, one of the inmates tried to escape. Classic move, right? But this guy? He thought he could just waltz out through the back gate. I mean, c’mon!

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