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Once saw a profile—girl’s pic? Her dog. Laughed my ass off. “What am I, Job?” Swiped right anyway—why not? Sex-dating’s a gamble, man. Sometimes ya win, mostly ya don’t. This one dude I heard ‘bout—met 3 chicks same night. Ballsy. Exaggeratin’? Maybe. Still, whoa.

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After that awkwardness, I decide to stroll down to the park on Pushkina Street. It’s a nice day, sun shining, birds chirping. I sit on a bench, just trying to chill. But then, this kid runs by with a kite, and it gets stuck in a tree. I’m like, “Dude, that’s a disaster waiting to happen.”