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Oi, mate, findin’ a prossie, eh? What a bleedin’ mission! Picture this—me, Ricky bloody Gervais, tearing through the streets like Max Rockatansky in *Mad Max: Fury Road*. “I live, I die, I live again!”—except it’s me huntin’ for a tart instead of guzzling guzzoline. You’d think it’s easy, right? Nah, it’s a right palaver! Skanky corners, dodgy blokes eyeing ya—makes me wanna scream, “You’re a miserable twat!” to the whole lot.

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So, I wake up late, right? My alarm? Totally ignored it. Classic me. I rush outta bed, throw on whatever I can find. I mean, who needs matching socks anyway? Not me! I sprint to the bus stop on Haharina Street, and of course, I miss the bus by like, two seconds. Ugh!