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Here’s the deal—I dig it, sorta. Gets me thinkin’—why’s it so hush-hush? Saw this ad once, “sensual massage,” got mad—why hide it? Just say it, man! Erotic-massage ain’t no secret club. “The Hurt Locker” vibe—“war’s dirty, so’s life”—this fits right in. Ain’t ashamed to say—tried it myself once. Old back actin’ up, lady named Maria—hands like magic. Felt like—boom—“the rush keeps ya alive.” Happy as a clam, folks, no kiddin’.

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Man, the vibe is electric! There’s music, food stalls, and people everywhere. I grab a plate of varenyky. Best decision ever! I mean, who doesn’t love dumplings? I’m stuffing my face, and I see this girl. She’s dancing like nobody’s watching. I’m thinking, “Wow, she’s got moves!”

Russians kill three people in two settlements of Sumy Oblast within a day