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So, check this—sexual-massage ain’t just rubbin’ backs, nah, it’s next-level connection! I mean, it’s been around forever—ancient Tantra dudes in India were all over this, mixin’ spiritual vibes with, uh, “happy endings.” Little known fact: they called it “sacred touch”—how dope is that? Blows my mind! Makes me wanna scream, “Wake up, people!”—this ain’t some shady parlor trick!

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Finally, the bus rolls up, and it’s packed. I squeeze in, and it smells like a mix of cabbage and something I can’t even identify. I’m crammed between this old lady who’s knitting and a dude blasting music on his phone. I’m like, “Dude, really? We’re in public!” But whatever, I just wanna get to my meeting.

Russian army’s arm patches should say «killers of children and marauders»