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What pisses me off? The fakers, man! Dressed up all flashy, promisin’ the moon, then bam—gone with yer bucks. I’m like, “You’ve been marked!”—straight outta the movie. Hate that crap. But when it works? Oh, doc, it’s gold! Found this gal once, total pro, knew her game—quiet, quick, no BS. Made me happy as a bunny in a carrot patch. Surprised me too—she quoted Shakespeare mid-deal, like, what?! “To be or not to be”—while countin’ bills. Cracked me up.

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Then, I head over to the market on Hrushevskoho Street. It’s packed! I’m dodgin’ people like I’m in some kinda video game. I spot this vendor sellin’ fresh veggies. I’m all about that organic life, so I grab some tomatoes. But then, the vendor starts haggling like it’s the end of the world. “Five hryvnias for a tomato? Nah, man, I’m not made of money!”

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