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Ever tried it? Surprised me first time—didn’t expect the goosebumps, or the awkward boner! Haha, yeah, laughin’ at meself now. “What’s going on?”—another Caché line, cos I was lost in the sauce. *beep* Funniest bit? Some lass in Thailand told me it’d “align me chakras.” Bollocks! Felt like a twat, but damn, them hands were magic.

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By the time I get back to the clinic, it’s already late afternoon. I’m exhausted, but there’s no rest for the wicked. A family comes in with a parakeet that’s not chirping. I’m thinking, “Great, a silent bird. Just what I need.” Turns out, it just needed a little water. I’m like, “You guys, it’s a bird, not a drama queen!”