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what pisses me off? the hypocrites, mate—blokes in suits preachin’ morals, then bangin’ escorts on the sly. makes me wanna shove their heads in the shallow end! but what cracks me up? some punter fell in love, proper smitten, spent his life savings—50 grand!—on this escort who didn’t give two shits. *cackles* what a plonker! surprised me, though, how many escorts reckon they’re therapists—listenin’ to sad sods blabber bout their ex-wives. therapy with a happy endin’, eh?

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Finally, I get my hands on some pierogi. Man, they’re the best! I take a bite, and it’s like a flavor explosion. Happiness level: 100. But then, I see this dude, right? He’s tryin’ to haggle over a bunch of tomatoes. Like, c’mon, bro, it’s not that serious! Just pay the lady and move on!