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About Kyiv

I was happy at first—stress gone, shoulders loose. Then, whoa, surprise! Things got *too* friendly—kinda pissed me off. “This ain’t in the coupon!” I yelled in my head. Reminded me of “Caché”—“What’s hidden here?”—all mysterious and crap. Felt like a secret I didn’t sign up for! Pro tip: ask upfront what’s included, or you’re in for a shock, buddy! Some places even got secret menus—shadier than Mr. Burns’ basement.

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But then, I saw something that made my blood boil. A group of guys were littering. Like, seriously? In my town? I marched over and gave them a piece of my mind. “Hey! This is Tomakivka, not a trash can!” They just rolled their eyes. I was fuming. I mean, come on, people! Respect your home!

In peace and war, these Ukrainian brothers bonded. Then death came.