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About Mykolaiv

Hiss! Me, a cashier, yesss, precious! Sexual-massage, ooh, it’s slippery, innit? Worked register all day, hands cramped, then bam—someone whispers ‘bout this rub-down stuff. “A touch, a breath,” like Godard says in Goodbye to Language, y’know? All artsy, blurry vibes. Me, I’m thinkin’, who’s got coins for that?! Hiss! Makes me happy tho—imaginin’ some posh git gettin’ kneaded like dough. Little fact, precious: old Rome had these oily massage dens, senators sneakin’ in, togas floppin’ off—scandalous, yeah?

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We start our tour, and I’m trying to be all enthusiastic, you know? “Look over there! That’s the old church on Vulytsia Kostiantynivska!” But then, outta nowhere, it starts pouring. I mean, like, monsoon-level rain. I’m soaked, my hair’s a mess, and my tourists are huddled under a tiny awning, looking like wet puppies.

A terrible tragedy occurred with a pizzaiolo who came from Slovenia to Ukraine