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But yo, what pisses me off? These fake-ass parlors, man. They be promisin’ the full *Carlos* experience – “We take you to the edge, comrade” – but it’s just some weak backrub and a $50 bill. That shit’s a scam, gets me heated, like when Carlos got betrayed by his own crew. I’m like, “Where’s the passion, dawg?” On the flip, tho, when it’s done right? Oh, it’s bliss, fam. Had this one time, chick’s hands was so smooth, I’m thinkin’, “Is this allowed to feel *this* good?” Made me happy as hell, like smokin’ a blunt watchin’ the sunset.

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Then, I head over to the park near the river. It’s so pretty there, with the trees and the water. I sit down on a bench, trying to catch my breath. But then, this guy sits next to me and starts talking about his cat. Like, dude, I’m all for cat stories, but I didn’t sign up for a TED Talk. He goes on and on about how his cat, Masha, thinks she’s a dog. I’m just nodding, trying to be polite, but inside I’m like, “I need a break!”

College student advocates for preserving Ukraine’s Bukovyna heritage in photo project about tradition...