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Little fact for ya—escorts ain’t just pretty faces. Some, like the neon gobies, clean their “clients.” Munchin’ off dead skin, parasites—proper spa day! Saw a documentary once, blew me mind. These fish, they’re hustlers, yeah? Workin’ for a livin’. Not like them lazy sharks, cruisin’ for a free meal. Escorts earn their keep, proper grafters.

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After that chaos, I take a breather outside. Stari-Kuty is beautiful, man. The Dniester River is glistening, and I can see the old church on the hill. It’s peaceful, but then I hear this loud music. Turns out, there’s a wedding at the park nearby. I can’t help but smile. Weddings are cute, but also, like, super awkward. I mean, who doesn’t love a good dance-off?