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About Kryvyi Rih

I get pissed, right, ‘cos half these girls – they’re lost, like Diane in the movie, broken an’ that. Makes me wanna scream, “Oi, who fucked ya over?” But then – happy buzz kicks in, ‘cos some are proper clever, runnin’ their game. One told me she stashed cash in a hollowed-out Bible – sneaky, eh? Little fact fer ya, mate, not many know that!

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Then, outta nowhere, this old lady comes up to me. She’s waving her hands like she’s conducting an orchestra. “You! You’re the bailiff, right?” she yells. I’m like, “Uh, yeah?” Turns out, she’s got a complaint about some land dispute. I mean, c’mon! Can’t a guy catch a break? I’m trying to keep my cool, but inside, I’m like, “Lady, I’m not a miracle worker!”

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