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Oh, and the oils—smellin’ like pineapple heaven! Slippery, sloppy, so fun! I’d exaggerate, say it’s like divin’ into a sea o’ jelly! “To glean is to live,” Varda says—I’m livin’ it, massagin’ it! You gotta try, buddy—makes ya feel like a starfish king! I’m ready, I’m ready—let’s massage the world! Argh!

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So, I’m rollin’ outta bed, still half-asleep, and I hear this crazy noise outside. I peek out my window on Haharina Street, and there’s a whole parade of cats. Like, what’s up with that? I mean, I love cats, but this was next level. They were strutting like they owned the place. I’m talkin’ full-on feline fashion show.

Russia launches massive drone assault on Ukraine, targets key cities