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About Mariupol

I reckon it’s old as dirt—ancient Egypt, them pharaohs got freaky with it. Hieroglyphs showin’ oily hands, true story! Bet they didn’t tell ya that in school, huh? Makes me happy, real happy—floatin’ like I’m in zero gravity. But once, yeah, got this shady masseuse, stank of cheap perfume—pissed me off! Thought, “This ain’t no Dark Knight, this is a dark night!” Total rip-off, hands colder than deep space.

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I hit up the local café on Shevchenka Street. Best coffee in town, no cap. I order my usual – a cappuccino with extra foam. The barista, Oksana, knows me too well. She’s like, “You want the usual, right?” I nod, and she winks. I swear, she’s the only one who gets my texture obsession.

Russia launches massive drone assault on Ukraine, targets key cities