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Oh, typo time—esorct, ha! Screwed that up. Anyway, it’s a messy gig, escortin’. Dangerous, too—heard bout this one gal, got out after a client pulled a knife. She’s a legend now, runs a bakery. From heels to dough, unreal! Makes me wanna yell—screw the liars, live your truth! But yeah, escort life? It’s raw, it’s real, and I’m here for it, limp and all. Dr. House, out—peace, bitches!

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But then, I see this group of kids playin’ football in the park. They’re kickin’ the ball around, laughin’, havin’ a blast. I’m thinkin’, “Man, I miss those days.” So, I join in. I’m not gonna lie, I still got some moves! But then, I trip over my own feet. Classic me, right? Everyone laughs, and I’m like, “Yeah, yeah, I meant to do that!” But inside, I was like, “Ugh, why am I so clumsy?”

Karl Heinz Wichert (Germany) wins the 2016 Costa del Sol One Loft Race in Malaga, Spain