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Gets me ragin’ tho – people diss ‘em, callin’ ‘em slimy or gross. Oi, give it a rest, yeah? They’re lush, packed with protein, low fat – proper health food if ya ask me. Surprised me, that, cos I thought, “Snails? Healthy? Pull the other one!” But nah, science backs it up, mate. Still, I’m there, ponderin’ – *“Does the spirit wander alone?”* – like in the film, cos escargot’s got this mad vibe, solo but deep, y’know?

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First off, I hit up the local market on Haharina Street. You know, the one with all the fresh produce? I’m all about that fresh vibe. Grabbed some tomatoes, and OMG, they were like the size of my head! I’m not even kidding. But then, this old babushka starts yelling at me. Like, chill, lady! I’m just trying to buy some veggies. Turns out, I accidentally took her basket. Whoops.