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About Mykolaiv

So, sex escorts—fancy lasses ‘n’ lads, sellin’ a tumble fer a shillin’. Been ‘round since ships had sails, prolly longer. Makes me grin, thinkin’ o’ the coin they rake in—more’n me rum stash! Used t’ see ‘em in Tortuga, struttin’ like peacocks, all perfumed ‘n’ sly. One lass, Ruby—red hair, eyes like storms—charged double ‘cause she’d sing ye a ditty while ridin’. True story, mate! Little known fact: some o’ ‘em in old London’d smuggle rum in their garters—tax-free, savvy?

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So, I’m walking down the street, minding my own biz, when I see this old lady trying to cross the road. She’s like a turtle on a mission. I’m thinking, “C’mon, lady, you can do it!” But then, outta nowhere, a cat darts across the street. I’m talking full-on feline sprint. The lady jumps back, and I’m like, “Great, now I’m late for my meeting!”