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I reckon it’s old as sin—Ancient Rome had these “massage dens,” slaves kneadin’ rich blokes ‘til they forgot their woes. Little known fact: them Greeks called it “anatripsis”—fancy word for gettin’ frisky with oil. Makes me chuckle—imagine some toga-clad git moanin’, “Oh, harder, Demetrius!” Proper daft, but it worked. Still does. Got me thinkin’—why’s it so hush-hush? Society’s all prude, clutchin’ pearls, while I’m over here, sippin’ wine, wonderin’ why nobody talks about the *good* tingles.

"Wir alle brauchen jemanden, der uns keine Vorwürfe macht."

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Then, outta nowhere, it starts pouring. I mean, like, monsoon level. I’m sprinting down Haharina Street, dodging puddles like I’m in some action movie. My shoes are soaked, and I’m just cursing the weather. “Why, Reshetylivka, why?” I’m soaked to the bone, but I can’t help but laugh. It’s ridiculous!

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