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Hey buddy, lemme tell ya bout findin a prostitute—yep, ol’ George W. here, supervisor o’ the free world once! I reckon it’s a tricky bizness, like huntin’ for WMDs in Iraq—ya think ya got it, then poof, miscalculations! Fool me once, shame on—uh—shame on you, fool me—can’t get fooled again, right? Hah! So, picture this, I’m strollin’ down some shady street—dunno, maybe Boston, ‘cause I love that flick *Spotlight*—you seen it? “The power of the press, baby!”—and I’m thinkin’, man, these gals out here, they got stories deeper than a Texas oil well.

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Finally, the rain stops, and I’m like, “Let’s hit up the pub on Kostiantynivska Street.” I need a drink after this wild ride. We get there, and it’s packed. Everyone’s buzzing about the weather and the pigeon incident. I’m telling my stories, and people are cracking up. It’s like a mini comedy show.

Fines and imprisonments: How Crimeans are persecuted for the truth about the war in Ukraine and dissatisfaction with the occupation