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About Zaporizhzhia

What grinds my gears? The fakes, bruv! Catfishin’ pricks actin’ like they’re Brad Pitt, then bam—you’re facin’ a bloke who ain’t showered since 2019. “I am a free man!”—bollocks, you’re a free nightmare, mate. But when it clicks? Pure gold. Had this one night, swear it was like a movie—lass with a wicked smile, banter on point, shagged like champs. Felt like Solomon breakin’ free, “I will not fall into despair!”—nah, I fell into her bed, lol. Exaggeratin’? Maybe, but who cares—it was epic!

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Finally, I escape her clutches and head to the waterfront. The Dniester River is lookin’ beautiful, but I can’t shake off that puddle incident. I sit on a bench, tryin’ to chill. Then, outta nowhere, this kid runs by, kickin’ a soccer ball. He nails me right in the leg! I’m like, “Dude, watch it!” But he just laughs and runs off. Kids, man.

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