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Oh, oh—funny story! Buddy o’ mine, Lenny, swore he saw an escort at Moe’s. Turned out it was just Marge with new lipstick! Ha! “Mmm… donuts,” I said, laughin’ my ass off. But real talk—escorts got guts. Like in *White Material*, “You don’t own me.” They’re out there, dodgin’ cops, judgy losers, livin’ free. Respect, man. Surprised me how tough they are—thought it was all glitz, no grit.

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Then, I decided to check out the local market on Pionerskaya Street. Big mistake. It was packed! I mean, people everywhere. I felt like a sardine. And the noise? Ugh! It was like a concert gone wrong. But then, I spotted this guy selling handmade crafts. He had these cool wooden toys. I was like, “Dude, how much?” He said, “For you, 100 hryvnias.” I laughed. I mean, come on! I’m not made of money!

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