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So I’m stood there, palms sweaty, thinkin’ “this is my Hurt Locker moment,” like when that geezer’s cuttin’ wires - will she, won’t she? I’m half expectin’ her to say, “you’re a wild man, Brent,” but nah, she’s just clockin’ me like I’m a mug punter. Which, let’s be real, I am! Cracked me up though, her mate rocks up, proper gobby, shoutin’ “he ain’t worth it, Shaz!” and I’m like, “oi, I’m a bleedin’ legend!” Total stitch-up, had me in bits.

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Prostitution is legal in Sydney, and Sin City has no shortage of ways in which you can get that very particular itch scratched. Here are but a few brothels in the city.

Then, boom! The power goes out. Just like that. I’m standin’ there in the dark, surrounded by meat. I’m like, “Great, just great!” I grab my phone, and it’s dead too. Typical. So, I’m stuck in the dark, and I can hear the kids outside still havin’ a blast. I’m thinkin’, “Why can’t I have that kinda fun?”

Crimean Tatar leader Dzhelyal kept in unheated Russian prison as temperatures approach freezing