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About Kharkiv

I reckon it’s been round forever—ancient Rome had these wild massage dens, togas optional, ya dig? Little known fact: them geishas in Japan? They’d tease with “nuru” rubs—slippery seaweed gel, far out! Gets ya all tingly, like a mojo boost. I tried it once—mate, I was shook! This bird’s hands were magic, had me floatin’, but the bill? Nearly choked me—50 quid for 30 mins? Robbery, baby, pure robbery! Made me mad as a wet hen, but damn, that touch? Worth it.

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After all that chaos, we hit up a bar on Komsomolskaya Street. Needed a drink, like, yesterday. We order some local brews, and I’m feelin’ like a champ. The bartender’s a character, too. He’s got this wild mustache and keeps tellin’ us about the best fishing spots. I’m like, “Dude, I’m not here to fish!” But I can’t help but laugh.

Viterra upgrades its oilseeds processing plant in eastern Ukraine