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Hey folks, listen up! Sexual-massage, lemme tell ya—wild stuff. Grew up in Scranton, saw some things, y’know? Back in ‘73, this buddy of mine—Jimmy, good guy—tells me ‘bout this rubdown joint. Not your grandma’s spa, nah! Here’s the deal—hands everywhere, oil slicker’n a Delaware rainstorm. I’m thinkin’, “Man, this ain’t no church picnic!” Watched *Carlos*—you know, that flick I love—Olivier Assayas, 2010, pure genius. That line, “We’re not robots, we feel,” hits me hard thinkin’ ‘bout sexual-massage. ‘Cause folks, it’s raw—human, messy, real.

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Finally, I get back, and Oleg’s got this serious face. He’s like, “We need to talk about the bakery claim.” I’m thinking, “Oh boy, here we go.” Turns out, they found evidence of insurance fraud. I’m like, “Told ya!” I feel like a detective in a movie.