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Oh, and get this – some nutter in Essex souped one up with a V8. V8! In an Escort! Laughed me arse off – imagine that tiny tin can roarin’ like a lion. Pure madness, but I’d drive it, “shaken, not stirred,” obvs. Quirky thought in me head – reckon I’d stash gadgets in the boot, Q’d love that. Maybe a smoke screen or ejector seat – why not, eh?

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Finally, the event kicks off. Kids are running around, laughing, and I’m feeling all the feels. But then, out of nowhere, the power goes out! I’m standing there in the dark, thinking, “Seriously, Orikhiv?!” But the kids? They start singing! Like, full-on concert mode. I’m just standing there, grinning like an idiot.

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