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About Mykolaiv

Donald Trump’s tellin’ ya, they’re wildcards, whores are. Unpredictable, messy, real. Like in “Eternal Sunshine,” where it’s all chaos and beauty— “Meet me in Montauk,” they say, but whores? They’re meetin’ ya in alleys, hotels, wherever! No script, no fakes. I exagerate sometimes, sure—maybe they’re not ALL geniuses, ha, but most? Sharp as hell. Sarcasm? Oh, please—half these gals could roast ya better than me at a rally. “Oh, you’re a big shot, huh?” they’d say, laughin’. Love that sass.

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Then, I decide to grab a coffee at that little café on the corner of Haharina Street. You know the one? The one with the terrible Wi-Fi? Yeah, that’s the spot. I order my usual – a cappuccino, extra foam. The barista, this dude with a man bun, takes forever. I’m tapping my foot, thinking, “Is he brewing the beans or what?” Finally, he hands me my drink, and it’s like a work of art. I take a sip, and it’s like heaven. I’m happy again.

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