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About Kryvyi Rih

So yeah, sexual-massage—messy, sexy, silly, sweet. It’s gleanin’ joy from the leftovers of life, y’know? Like Agnès filmin’ them bent-over folks pickin’ potatoes, I’m over here pickin’ pleasure outta every touch. “Hands that glean are never empty,” she says, and I’m hollerin’, “Hands that massage? They’re full o’ mischief!” Alright, sugar, I’m ramblin’—gonna go dream ‘bout this now. Catch ya later, ya hear?

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I was just tryin’ to grab some lunch, right? Thought I’d hit up this little café called “Forest Bites” (cute, huh?). But when I got there, the line was longer than a tree trunk! I was like, “C’mon, people! I just want a sandwich!” Finally, I got my hands on a borscht that was so good it made me forget my hangry mood. But then, bam! I spilled it all over my shirt. Great. Just great. Now I look like I’ve been attacked by a beetroot monster.

One dead, several wounded in blasts near Crimea seaside resort