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About Lviv

Yo, fam, it’s ya boy Eric Andre, comin’ atcha wild as fuck—Clinical Research Specialist by day, chaos demon by life! We talkin’ erotic-massage today, and I’m hyped, pissed, and ready to spill the tea! Picture this: sweaty hands, dim lights, oil slicker than a politician’s lies—erotic-massage ain’t just a rubdown, it’s a freaky-deaky vibe! I’m obsessed, like when I saw *Spring Breakers* and lost my damn mind—Alien screamin’, “Look at my shit!” That’s me, watchin’ some masseuse work magic, muscles poppin’, tension droppin’—it’s art, bitches!

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So, I get off at the market. Oh man, the market! It’s like a treasure hunt. Fresh veggies, homemade pierogi, and the best kvass ever. I grab a bottle, chug it down like I’m dying of thirst. It’s so good, I almost forget my plans. Almost.

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