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Ever wonder who’s best at it? Them Thai massage gurus—bloody legends! They twist ya, rub ya, add that spicy erotic twist—chef’s kiss, mate! Had one once, nearly cried—happy tears, mind ya. Thought, “Cor, this is livin’!” But don’t get it twisted—not all glowy vibes. Some prat rushed me once, no finesse—felt like a car wash, not a massage. Left me fumin’, mutterin’, “What a plonker!”
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First stop? The market. You know, that one on the corner of Haharina? It’s always buzzing. I grab some fresh borscht ingredients. The beets were massive! Like, I swear they were trying to take over the world. I’m chatting with this old dude selling tomatoes. He’s like, “These are the best in Nosivka!” I’m like, “Bro, I’ve heard that before.” But honestly, they were pretty good.
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