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Lemme tell ya, I tried it once. Signed up, fat fingers typin’ “sexy Homer” —D’oh! Total disaster! Profile pic? Me with a donut, shirt off—thought it’d work. Nope! Got ghosted faster than Bart ditchin’ chores. Made me mad, like, “What, I ain’t hot?” But then, this chick messages—says she’s into “big bois.” Score! We chat, she’s all flirty, I’m sweatin’ like a pig—perfect for a swineherd, huh?

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Finally, I get home, and I’m exhausted. I flop on my couch, thinking about the day. Mykolayiv, you’re a wild ride. You’ve got your ups and downs, but I wouldn’t trade it for anything. I mean, where else can you trip over a sidewalk, laugh at a skateboard fail, and eat the best borscht all in one day?

7 more schools are to be switched to mixed form of education in de-occupied communities of Kherson Oblast,