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So, sexual-massage – it’s not just a quick fumble, nah, it’s ancient! Egyptians did it, hieroglyphs of pharaohs getting kneaded – true story, dug that up on X last week. Makes ya wonder, right? Kings paid big for a slippery sesh. Nowadays, it’s hush-hush, underground – but booming! Stats say 1 in 10 blokes tried it, probs more, they’re just shy. We shall never surrender to the taboo, lads!

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So, I had to improvise. I grabbed some old tools from the back. They were rusty and probably older than my grandma. But hey, a cooper’s gotta do what a cooper’s gotta do. I started working on this big barrel for some local winery. They wanted it for their new batch of wine. I was like, “Great, no pressure!”

Between the "Whites" and the "Reds": Who carried out pogroms against the Jews during the Civil War?