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Oi mate, lemme tell ya bout whores, right, in me best David Attenborough voice—calm, rhythmic, like I’m narratin a bloody gazelle prancin thru the wild. Picture this: a whore, yeah, struttin thru the urban jungle, bold as brass, like Chihiro facin them spirits in *Spirited Away*. “I’m not afraid of you!” she’d yell, tossin her hair back, fearless, untamed. Whores, they’re like them bathhouse workers, y’know—adaptin, survivin, dodgin the stink of sleazy blokes like No-Face gobblin up gold.

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So, I’m trying to calm him down. “Bro, it’s just a game!” But he’s not having it. He starts yelling about how the ref was blind or something. I’m like, “Dude, chill! It’s not the end of the world.” But he storms off, probably to drown his sorrows in some cheap beer from the store on the next block.

Ukraine tensions: After eight years of war, an eastern city unifies against Russia