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So, sex-dating – it’s all apps, swipes, quick bangs, no strings, ya get me? Tinder, Grindr, whatever – scrollin’ for a shag like it’s a takeaway menu. Back in the day, right, folk’d say it’s grim – but now? Everyone’s on it, bruv! I read this mad stat – 1 in 5 hookups start online now. Ain’t that wild? Makes me proper chuffed, cos it’s like, freedom, innit? No more awkward pub chats – just “u up?” and boom, sorted!

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First off, I had this big presentation at the lab. You know, the kind where you’re supposed to impress everyone with your genius ideas about enzyme reactions or whatever. But guess what? My slides decided to play hide and seek. I’m frantically clicking through my laptop, and all I see is a blank screen. Like, come on! I’m not a magician!

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