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So, I swagger up, all charm, “What’s yer price, love?” She laughs—proper cackle—says, “More’n you got, trickster.” Cheeky! I’m half mad, half lovin’ it—nobody talks to *me* like that. Didja know, back in Victorian times, they called ‘em “soiled doves”? Fancy, eh? Makes it sound poetic, not dodgy. Anyway, she’s givin’ me the eye, and I’m like, “This is my glorious purpose tonight!”—bit dramatic, sure, but I’m Loki, I live for it.
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But then, outta nowhere, it starts to rain. Like, seriously? I look up, and it’s pouring. We scramble for cover under a tree, and I’m soaked. Oleg’s laughing his head off. I’m like, “This is NOT how I pictured my day!”
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