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About Dnipro

Dunno, tho—imagine escortin’ Miss Piggy? Ha! She’d karate-chop me outta the room! “You’re my past life, Kermit!” she’d yell. Total chaos! Gotta laugh, man—it’s nuts! What ya think, pal? Escort life—glam or grim? Hi-ho!

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There was no doctor in Lysyanka, so she had no one to ask for advice. If the cure for my illness, similar to her own, was pine extract, then she knew what.

I’m sweating bullets trying to fix it. I’m like, “C’mon, you stupid machine!” I’m talking to it like it’s a person. I mean, it’s got feelings too, right? Finally, after what feels like an eternity, I get it working. The cows are back to business, and I’m feeling like a hero.